Advice By Kim

Every Girl Needs a Father

Me & Dad on my wedding day. The limo has arrived. As I walk out, my bridal gown gets caught in the garden. The photographer captures a tender moment when my Dad helps me with my gown.

When it came to my wishlist for Mr. Mc DreamBoat, I had one particular dealbreaker for me to consider a guy to be husband material. He needed to be able to build me a house from the ground up with his bare hands. Just like my Dad. Do you think that is unreasonable?

When I was 8 years old, my Dad built me a 2-story clubhouse in our backyard. He told me to draw it on paper and he will build it for me. So I went to school and used the computer paper with green and white stripes to draw my Mc DreamHouse.

Every girl needs a father to be the standard for which she will judge all other men.

Kim Evazians

Flash forward to my college years, I dated a guy who was 11 years older than me. I was 20 and he was 31. He was a pre-medical student who had his own construction company and did contract work building fireplaces, maintenance, and remodeling homes and offices. He could definitely build a house from the ground up with his bare hands.

After him, I dated guys who were well-to-do trust fund babies. Very handsome, clean, neat, well-spoken, well-mannered and well-dressed… But they couldn’t build a house. That will never do. I wanted a guy with a bit more manliness, ruggedness, and handy-ness. It was a real dealbreaker for me.

I did not want a soft man, a useless playboy or a Fed Bear who has been spoonfed and can do nothing for himself. I didn’t want a man child with no life skills.

I have a saying, “A Fed Bear is a dead bear.”

I wanted to marry a Conqueror type where there is nothing he cannot do… No problem he cannot solve… A guy who says, “For every problem, there is a solution.”

In my lifetime, I have been fortunate enough to know many men with this capability. One of them is my husband. Not only does he enjoy solving problems, but he also has a knack for coming up with ingenious and elegant solutions.

And yes, my husband can build anything with his bare hands–mechanical, plumbing, and electrical. When he was 5 years old, he took the VCR apart and completely dismantled it. All the parts and screws were laid out in a neat and orderly fashion so that he could remember how to put it back together. As a child, he was perfectly poised, self-directed and organized.

His parents never freaked out, never got mad, and never yelled at him for “breaking” the VCR. He didn’t break it. He was just a curious child who wanted to know how it worked, and the only way was to learn was to take it apart. After his curiosity was satisfied, he put the VCR back together and it still worked.

How many 5-year-olds do you know can do this? Most kids are kicking around in the sandbox at that age.

What is your Wishlist for Mr. Mc DreamBoat? What are your deal breakers?

Thanks to my Dad, I knew what was possible. He is the standard by which I judge all other men. I had a strategy for vetting Mr. Mc DreamBoat. I had unreasonably high standards. I never compromised. I was strict but successful, and ended up marrying the best husband ever.

Happy Father’s Day!

Kim Evazians
The Strict But Successful Coach

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