Male Universe

Masculine Insecurity Is Real

Masculine insecurity is a real issue due to their hardwiring and inner child wounds.

It’s not something you should just write off like, “Oh, he’s just insecure!” and use that to shame men for your relationship problems. So you take the focus off of you and blame it all on them. That is being insensitive, inconsiderate and self-absorbed.

You must learn how to do your part and do it graciously and lovingly. All relationships are your mirror. You don’t live in a vacuum. Men react to your actions. Therefore, how a man treats you tells me how well you are (or not) doing The Rules.

Take responsibility for everything you create in your life because the Divine Feminine leads on an emotional and spiritual level. (Yes, The Rules Books does say that women carry the emotional burden of the relationship, not the man.)

The male ego is ultra sensitive, fragile and should be handled with care. You can help a man feel more secure is by doing The Rules as a daily, consistent way of life in ALL your relationships, not just with men. But mostly on YOURSELF.

A man needs a woman who is sweet, gracious and respectful while standing in her own power, her supreme femininity. Not a loud, bossy, controlling, power-obsessed woman who is disrespectful of his masculinity.

Healthy boundaries, self-control and Holding Your Mood is always classy and ATTRACTIVE.

Doing The Rules brings out the best in you and in your man.

If you are too self-absorbed, emotionally heavy or resentful of men “being men,” then relationships are NOT for you.

Kim Evazians
The Strict But Successful Coach

For advice, please book an appointment by sending a Wufoo Form.

Advice By Kim

Every Girl Needs a Father

Me & Dad on my wedding day. The limo has arrived. As I walk out, my bridal gown gets caught in the garden. The photographer captures a tender moment when my Dad helps me with my gown.

When it came to my wishlist for Mr. Mc DreamBoat, I had one particular dealbreaker for me to consider a guy to be husband material. He needed to be able to build me a house from the ground up with his bare hands. Just like my Dad. Do you think that is unreasonable?

When I was 8 years old, my Dad built me a 2-story clubhouse in our backyard. He told me to draw it on paper and he will build it for me. So I went to school and used the computer paper with green and white stripes to draw my Mc DreamHouse.

Every girl needs a father to be the standard for which she will judge all other men.

Kim Evazians

Flash forward to my college years, I dated a guy who was 11 years older than me. I was 20 and he was 31. He was a pre-medical student who had his own construction company and did contract work building fireplaces, maintenance, and remodeling homes and offices. He could definitely build a house from the ground up with his bare hands.

After him, I dated guys who were well-to-do trust fund babies. Very handsome, clean, neat, well-spoken, well-mannered and well-dressed… But they couldn’t build a house. That will never do. I wanted a guy with a bit more manliness, ruggedness, and handy-ness. It was a real dealbreaker for me.

I did not want a soft man, a useless playboy or a Fed Bear who has been spoonfed and can do nothing for himself. I didn’t want a man child with no life skills.

I have a saying, “A Fed Bear is a dead bear.”

I wanted to marry a Conqueror type where there is nothing he cannot do… No problem he cannot solve… A guy who says, “For every problem, there is a solution.”

In my lifetime, I have been fortunate enough to know many men with this capability. One of them is my husband. Not only does he enjoy solving problems, but he also has a knack for coming up with ingenious and elegant solutions.

And yes, my husband can build anything with his bare hands–mechanical, plumbing, and electrical. When he was 5 years old, he took the VCR apart and completely dismantled it. All the parts and screws were laid out in a neat and orderly fashion so that he could remember how to put it back together. As a child, he was perfectly poised, self-directed and organized.

His parents never freaked out, never got mad, and never yelled at him for “breaking” the VCR. He didn’t break it. He was just a curious child who wanted to know how it worked, and the only way was to learn was to take it apart. After his curiosity was satisfied, he put the VCR back together and it still worked.

How many 5-year-olds do you know can do this? Most kids are kicking around in the sandbox at that age.

What is your Wishlist for Mr. Mc DreamBoat? What are your deal breakers?

Thanks to my Dad, I knew what was possible. He is the standard by which I judge all other men. I had a strategy for vetting Mr. Mc DreamBoat. I had unreasonably high standards. I never compromised. I was strict but successful, and ended up marrying the best husband ever.

Happy Father’s Day!

Kim Evazians
The Strict But Successful Coach

For advice, please book an appointment by sending a Wufoo Form.

Male Universe

Strict Yet Feminine Advice

Dating is psychological warfare. Not therapy.

The secret to “The Rules” is to seem like you have no strategy whatsoever.

You must seem innocent, aloof, natural, and uncontrived as if it happened magically.

Men will know on the first date if you are trying to get them. They will recoil and put up walls against you. From that moment on, they will become immune to any kind of flirting or “moves.” The first few dates is the critical window.

One of the reasons many women have been doing The Rules for years yet cannot get a husband (ế) is they show their hand. Their intentions are obvious, which makes them seem desperate and manipulative.

This is due to lack of education, parenting, personal development and self-awareness. Other than ignorance, it’s intellectual arrogance and unbacked vanity.

It’s often people who say, “Just be yourself.” This is the worst advice ever. It keeps them single and unevolved creatures that get ruthlessly weeded out by natural selection.

The most common mistake women make is telling a man how to date you. Do not teach him “The Rules.” You are his date, not his mother or teacher. It’s extremely rude, offensive and most of all, it doesn’t work.

Kim’s “Strict Yet Feminine” Advice:

1. Texting him to confirm a date: “Are we still on for this Sat?”
It shows your need for control. It also says you are deeply insecure. When a man is keen on meeting you, he is looking forward to it and might remind you just to make sure YOU don’t forget! Be relaxed and trust that he will show up. Your silence shows calm confidence and supreme femininity.

If he doesn’t, then he’s showing you who he really is. He is not a man you can rely on. You need someone who is mature, stable, responsible and trustworthy. Be glad he didn’t show up and waste your time. Write him off. Use the Modern Geisha Mantra to gracefully deal with rejection:

A Modern Geisha is always moving in a good mood. She is always calm, beautiful, happy, serene, grateful and unperturbed.

-Kim Evazians

Don’t be bitter. Be efficient. Move on. Never give anyone the power to ruin your day.

2. Refusing a “coffee date” just because you don’t drink coffee.
I wouldn’t even mention that. It’s negative and unnecessary. The point is not to drink coffee. It’s a venue to connect in real life to see if there’s chemistry. You don’t have to drink coffee. Order sparkling water, juice, or tea.

Don’t be so literal, heavy and exacting. It’s not feminine or gracious. Definitely not “Light & Breezy” as The Rules authors say.

He can find out later that you don’t drink coffee as he spends time with you. Be a complete mystery. Don’t reveal everything at once. Let him get to know you one layer at a time.

Actions are more elegant than words. The less words, the better. Avoid saying anything negative. Keep a positive vibe. This will intrigue him and make hopelessly addicted to you. It sets you apart from the uneducated bumpkin*.

3. Asking him to pick you if he doesn’t offer: “Um… Can you pick me up?”
A gentleman always plans, always picks you up, always pays. When a man is interested, he is gallant, chivalrous, and makes an effort to impress you. He cannot wait to be in the same room with you, smell your hair, bask in your beauty and breathe your essence. This is romantic courtship.

If he doesn’t offer to pick you up from the beginning, then it means he’s just not crazy about you or he’s not a gentleman or he’s lazy. Do you really want to spend time with someone like that? I have better things to do, like go wash my hair.

4. Telling him to come to your area as a counter-move if he doesn’t want to come to you:
When a man is serious about meeting you, one of the first things he will ask is information about your location, places you like to hang out, and where is a convenient meeting place. He will be accommodating and show effort.

He may also be interested in checking out your area and get a sense of your town if he is traveling from another city. Even if your town is small, he will go just because you are there.

Men are hunters. They love adventure. They like exploring new places. They thrive on challenge. It makes them manly. If they don’t, it makes me wonder how much of a man are they? Is he an alpha male or a delicate pansy*?

5. Last tip for being a lady: If a man opens the door or pulls out your chair for the first time…
Don’t gush and get all giddy like a high school teenager and say, “Oh my God. You are the first man who has ever done this! It’s about time I met a real gentleman!” Compose yourself. Remain poised and self-possessed. Act like you’ve always had men opening doors for you. Every day.

If he brings you flowers on the first date, don’t say with your mouth side open, “Oh my God, I have never gotten flowers!!! These are sooo beautiful!!! Thank you!!!” and act like you’re about to faint.

Behave as though you’ve been getting flowers since you were a teenager in high school. Channel your inner Prom Queen. Maintain your composure. Have a disciplined facial expression. Don’t lose it over flowers.

These are subtle distinctions that can make a girl go from a “Ten” to “Six” in 60 seconds on the first few dates. It is during this critical window a man will form his lifelong opinion of you and decide if you are marriage material. Therefore, it is critical to master the art of making a grand entrance.

They teach this in Charm School… Or at least they did once upon a time… For women to be well-married. So much depends on your ability to make a good first impression. It’s the only one you will ever get.

Dictionary definitions courtesy of www.Cambridge.org
*bumpkin: a person from the countryside who is considered awkward and stupid.
*pansy: old-fashioned, offensive word use to describe a man who behaves in the way that is more typical of a woman.

Kim Evazians
The Strict But Successful Coach

Work with Kim: Advice by appointment. All questions must be submitted via Wufoo Form.

Modern Geisha

Creating Your Identity

What does “Modern Geisha” mean to you?

A Japanese geisha was highly educated and beautifully groomed to be the perfect companion to the Alpha Male (emperor, feudal lord, samurai) and the imperial ruling class of the Floating World.

I created the Modern Geisha philosophy to help women develop soul beauty, poise, and supreme femininity throughout their daily walk in life.

A Modern Geisha is always moving in a good mood. She is always calm, beautiful, happy, serene, grateful and unperturbed.

-KIM EVAZIANS

As far as I’m concerned, being a Modern Geisha isn’t about dating. It’s about feminine power.

It’s having an elegant code of ethics that will enable you to live a graceful, moral, and dignified way of life.

Getting the ring is once but power is forever…

Please visit my Modern Geisha Facebook fan page at: https://www.facebook.com/moderngeisha/

Kim Evazians
The Strict But Successful Coach

How to Work with Kim: Advice by appointment only. Please do not email unless if you are a client and I am requesting information for an upcoming consult. Due to the constant overload of emails, I am unable to answer any questions that are not booked and paid for through my website. To book a consult, please submit a Wufoo form. Thank you for your cooperation in this matter.

Modern Geisha

The Rules Mastery

You cannot master The Rules. Only yourself.

If truth be told, people don’t call me for The Rules. They call me for “How to Be a Modern Geisha.” This has been going on for years even though I don’t talk about it much publicly.

A Modern Geisha ranks among the “educated elite” and has a goddess-like quality that sets her apart from mere mortals. She has been beautifully groomed with ancient feminine wisdom to enrapture the heart of a “Conqueror” (aka The Alpha Male).

6 Fundamental Strategies of a Modern Geisha:
1) Seductive Power
2) Holding Your Mood
3) Fluid Thinking
4) Superior Strategy
5) Elegant Efficiency
6) Self-Mastery

Kim Evazians
The Strict But Successful Coach

How to Work with Kim: Advice by appointment only. Please do not email unless if you are a client and I am requesting information for an upcoming consult. Due to the constant overload of emails, I am unable to answer any questions that are not booked and paid for through my website. To book a consult, please submit a Wufoo form. Thank you for your cooperation in this matter.