Miss to Mrs

Date with Destiny 7.17

Photo by Raman Evazians boating on Lake Travis

Today is a very special milestone in my life and emotional day for me. It’s the day we decided to call the anniversary of when we met and became an official couple.

We met on July 14th in Austin while boating with mutual friends on the lake over the weekend. That following Monday, July 17th my husband sent his first email before asking me out on our first date. It was a date with destiny that would change my life forever.

You will always hear me talk about you have 30 seconds to make a good first impression. Everything after that is to confirm the kind of impression you made. So much depends on that critical window.

After all these years, I have even more confirmation that I married my soulmate. It was destiny.

I was going to share what my husband wrote to give you the kind of impression I left that sealed the deal so you can understand how men think, date and choose their mate.

But then I decided some things are better left a mystery.

Kim Evazians
The Strict But Successful Coach

For advice, please book an appointment by sending a Wufoo Form.

Male Universe

Masculine Insecurity Is Real

Masculine insecurity is a real issue due to their hardwiring and inner child wounds.

It’s not something you should just write off like, “Oh, he’s just insecure!” and use that to shame men for your relationship problems. So you take the focus off of you and blame it all on them. That is being insensitive, inconsiderate and self-absorbed.

You must learn how to do your part and do it graciously and lovingly. All relationships are your mirror. You don’t live in a vacuum. Men react to your actions. Therefore, how a man treats you tells me how well you are (or not) doing The Rules.

Take responsibility for everything you create in your life because the Divine Feminine leads on an emotional and spiritual level. (Yes, The Rules Books does say that women carry the emotional burden of the relationship, not the man.)

The male ego is ultra sensitive, fragile and should be handled with care. You can help a man feel more secure is by doing The Rules as a daily, consistent way of life in ALL your relationships, not just with men. But mostly on YOURSELF.

A man needs a woman who is sweet, gracious and respectful while standing in her own power, her supreme femininity. Not a loud, bossy, controlling, power-obsessed woman who is disrespectful of his masculinity.

Healthy boundaries, self-control and Holding Your Mood is always classy and ATTRACTIVE.

Doing The Rules brings out the best in you and in your man.

If you are too self-absorbed, emotionally heavy or resentful of men “being men,” then relationships are NOT for you.

Kim Evazians
The Strict But Successful Coach

For advice, please book an appointment by sending a Wufoo Form.

Modern Geisha

Life Strategies for Toxic People

While many people may give the appearance of being nice and friendly to you, deep under the surface, they are covertly toxic and destructive. 

Clients often call me for tactics on how to deal with their endless daily battles with toxic people.

For your own sanity, develop the ability to quickly recognize them and learn how to let them go.

Toxic people can prevent you from reaching your true potential. And they will do it at any cost.

I created the Modern Geisha philosophy to help women develop soul beauty, poise, and supreme femininity throughout their daily walk in life by writing this mantra:

A Modern Geisha is always moving in a good mood… She is always calm, beautiful, serene, happy, grateful and unperturbed.

Therefore, it is crucial to guard your serenity. Never allow anyone or anything to pollute your aura by allowing them to drag you into their emotional chaos.

Toxic people will put you in a bad mood. Walk away. Maintain your frame. So much depends on your ability to hold your mood.

To become a true Modern Geisha, you must embody supreme calmness under stress, elegant thinking, emotional stability, and mature order. This also means having healthy boundaries and the strength to let them go.

Due to the overwhelming amount of fan mail I get from beloved followers who have found my Modern Geisha audios and told me how much it has changed their life, I’m bringing back the Modern Geisha philosophy.

It is a more elegant way of being and a “refined system of education.”

Modern Geisha is the heart and soul of my teachings. It comes from “soul knowledge,” not by a book.

I am currently focusing on redeveloping and strengthening what I started in 2011-2013 when I was a baby coach.

All my best and original material was created back then. Thanks to all my “soul clients” who kept following me and would not let it go.

How to follow my Modern Geisha posts:
MG Facebook Fanpage: https://www.facebook.com/moderngeisha/
MG Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moderngeishasecrets/

Kim Evazians
The Strict But Successful Coach

For advice, please book an appointment by sending a Wufoo Form.

Male Universe

Strict Yet Feminine Advice

Dating is psychological warfare. Not therapy.

The secret to “The Rules” is to seem like you have no strategy whatsoever.

You must seem innocent, aloof, natural, and uncontrived as if it happened magically.

Men will know on the first date if you are trying to get them. They will recoil and put up walls against you. From that moment on, they will become immune to any kind of flirting or “moves.” The first few dates is the critical window.

One of the reasons many women have been doing The Rules for years yet cannot get a husband (ế) is they show their hand. Their intentions are obvious, which makes them seem desperate and manipulative.

This is due to lack of education, parenting, personal development and self-awareness. Other than ignorance, it’s intellectual arrogance and unbacked vanity.

It’s often people who say, “Just be yourself.” This is the worst advice ever. It keeps them single and unevolved creatures that get ruthlessly weeded out by natural selection.

The most common mistake women make is telling a man how to date you. Do not teach him “The Rules.” You are his date, not his mother or teacher. It’s extremely rude, offensive and most of all, it doesn’t work.

Kim’s “Strict Yet Feminine” Advice:

1. Texting him to confirm a date: “Are we still on for this Sat?”
It shows your need for control. It also says you are deeply insecure. When a man is keen on meeting you, he is looking forward to it and might remind you just to make sure YOU don’t forget! Be relaxed and trust that he will show up. Your silence shows calm confidence and supreme femininity.

If he doesn’t, then he’s showing you who he really is. He is not a man you can rely on. You need someone who is mature, stable, responsible and trustworthy. Be glad he didn’t show up and waste your time. Write him off. Use the Modern Geisha Mantra to gracefully deal with rejection:

A Modern Geisha is always moving in a good mood. She is always calm, beautiful, happy, serene, grateful and unperturbed.

-Kim Evazians

Don’t be bitter. Be efficient. Move on. Never give anyone the power to ruin your day.

2. Refusing a “coffee date” just because you don’t drink coffee.
I wouldn’t even mention that. It’s negative and unnecessary. The point is not to drink coffee. It’s a venue to connect in real life to see if there’s chemistry. You don’t have to drink coffee. Order sparkling water, juice, or tea.

Don’t be so literal, heavy and exacting. It’s not feminine or gracious. Definitely not “Light & Breezy” as The Rules authors say.

He can find out later that you don’t drink coffee as he spends time with you. Be a complete mystery. Don’t reveal everything at once. Let him get to know you one layer at a time.

Actions are more elegant than words. The less words, the better. Avoid saying anything negative. Keep a positive vibe. This will intrigue him and make hopelessly addicted to you. It sets you apart from the uneducated bumpkin*.

3. Asking him to pick you if he doesn’t offer: “Um… Can you pick me up?”
A gentleman always plans, always picks you up, always pays. When a man is interested, he is gallant, chivalrous, and makes an effort to impress you. He cannot wait to be in the same room with you, smell your hair, bask in your beauty and breathe your essence. This is romantic courtship.

If he doesn’t offer to pick you up from the beginning, then it means he’s just not crazy about you or he’s not a gentleman or he’s lazy. Do you really want to spend time with someone like that? I have better things to do, like go wash my hair.

4. Telling him to come to your area as a counter-move if he doesn’t want to come to you:
When a man is serious about meeting you, one of the first things he will ask is information about your location, places you like to hang out, and where is a convenient meeting place. He will be accommodating and show effort.

He may also be interested in checking out your area and get a sense of your town if he is traveling from another city. Even if your town is small, he will go just because you are there.

Men are hunters. They love adventure. They like exploring new places. They thrive on challenge. It makes them manly. If they don’t, it makes me wonder how much of a man are they? Is he an alpha male or a delicate pansy*?

5. Last tip for being a lady: If a man opens the door or pulls out your chair for the first time…
Don’t gush and get all giddy like a high school teenager and say, “Oh my God. You are the first man who has ever done this! It’s about time I met a real gentleman!” Compose yourself. Remain poised and self-possessed. Act like you’ve always had men opening doors for you. Every day.

If he brings you flowers on the first date, don’t say with your mouth side open, “Oh my God, I have never gotten flowers!!! These are sooo beautiful!!! Thank you!!!” and act like you’re about to faint.

Behave as though you’ve been getting flowers since you were a teenager in high school. Channel your inner Prom Queen. Maintain your composure. Have a disciplined facial expression. Don’t lose it over flowers.

These are subtle distinctions that can make a girl go from a “Ten” to “Six” in 60 seconds on the first few dates. It is during this critical window a man will form his lifelong opinion of you and decide if you are marriage material. Therefore, it is critical to master the art of making a grand entrance.

They teach this in Charm School… Or at least they did once upon a time… For women to be well-married. So much depends on your ability to make a good first impression. It’s the only one you will ever get.

Dictionary definitions courtesy of www.Cambridge.org
*bumpkin: a person from the countryside who is considered awkward and stupid.
*pansy: old-fashioned, offensive word use to describe a man who behaves in the way that is more typical of a woman.

Kim Evazians
The Strict But Successful Coach

Work with Kim: Advice by appointment. All questions must be submitted via Wufoo Form.

Modern Geisha

The Paradox of Feminine Power

Women who struggle with dating must understand that all relationships are exchanges of power.

You cannot ask or demand for power to be given to you.

It is an exchange of energy where something must be given in return. For example, these are forms of energy: time, money, material goods, labor, services or attention.

If you take, you must first give. Everything has a cost. This is the Law of Sowing and Reaping.

You want money? Earn.

You want knowledge? Study.

You want mastery? Train.

You want respect? Be respectful.

You want to be Queen? Serve.

You want power? Submit.

You want him to fall madly in love with you? (I teach this art in private MG lessons. This is my craft.)

True power is letting the other person believe they have total control.

This is how Modern Geishas became the wealthiest, most educated, most glamorous, and most respected women in the Japanese culture.

They figured out long ago that the best way to gain power is by giving it away.

Feminine power is like water: soft, fluid, and formless.

Water does not strive against Nature, it flows with the current.

The paradox of feminine power is being patient and passive. Not power-seeking or interested in control.

It runs parallel to the Wu Wei paradox: “to rule without effort.”

Wu Wei is accomplishing by non-action. Without effort. Without excessive struggle.

Trying too hard ruins everything. It is not seductive. It repels what you want.

If you remain neutral and uncontrived, even the elements will bend to your will.

Kim Evazians
The Strict But Successful Coach

How to Work with Kim: Advice by appointment only. Please do not email unless if you are a client and I am requesting information for an upcoming consult. Due to the constant overload of emails, I am unable to answer any questions that are not booked and paid for through my website. To book a consult, please submit a Wufoo form. Thank you for your cooperation in this matter.

Modern Geisha

Creating Your Identity

What does “Modern Geisha” mean to you?

A Japanese geisha was highly educated and beautifully groomed to be the perfect companion to the Alpha Male (emperor, feudal lord, samurai) and the imperial ruling class of the Floating World.

I created the Modern Geisha philosophy to help women develop soul beauty, poise, and supreme femininity throughout their daily walk in life.

A Modern Geisha is always moving in a good mood. She is always calm, beautiful, happy, serene, grateful and unperturbed.

-KIM EVAZIANS

As far as I’m concerned, being a Modern Geisha isn’t about dating. It’s about feminine power.

It’s having an elegant code of ethics that will enable you to live a graceful, moral, and dignified way of life.

Getting the ring is once but power is forever…

Please visit my Modern Geisha Facebook fan page at: https://www.facebook.com/moderngeisha/

Kim Evazians
The Strict But Successful Coach

How to Work with Kim: Advice by appointment only. Please do not email unless if you are a client and I am requesting information for an upcoming consult. Due to the constant overload of emails, I am unable to answer any questions that are not booked and paid for through my website. To book a consult, please submit a Wufoo form. Thank you for your cooperation in this matter.